American Hackers Upset Over Record High Outsourcing Of Hacktivism

Posted By on August 25, 2016

You know he intends to do the world harm with his fingers by how he isn’t showing them to you.

You know he intends to do the world harm with his fingers by how he isn’t showing them to you.

While the altruistic deeds of groups like Anonymouse, WikiLeaks and Lizard Squad still leave a lot to be desired, the mantra seems to be the same: screw authority, take down big money and help out the little guy. While most of that hasn’t actually happened with any of them, except for the occasional screwing of authority, the idea has remained… until now.

American Hackers and hacktivists all over are now complaining that they are losing their work to foreigners who are doing the same work, for less recognition.

“It’s really getting annoying,” said B33B33B01, which we didn’t even really know how to pronounce. His group, “Ch3353 B1TC4” is a small splinter off of Anonymouse and is getting fed up with the outsourcing. “You used to be able to know that someone you were Frankensteining code with or sharing your app to was an American, but not anymore. Thanks to IP spoofing and redirection we can’t even tell where anyone is from anymore. I mean, I guess someone we think isn’t American could actually be since we’re so good at hiding stuff now that we can’t verify it, but it’s how good they are that makes me think they aren’t from the USA.”

This hacker’s xenophobia is a growing trend that seems to be scaring away foreign hackers from joining American born groups. Duodenum from “POBOYZ” has another view on the matter, entirely.

“We need to make American hackers great again. These little Iranian kids are coming in, taking all of our good hack jobs and turning them around faster, with less notoriety quicker than you can say ‘ScarJo leaked nudes.’ It’s getting absurd and it’s not right. We don’t get paid to do this stuff so all we want and get is recognition for a job well done. Now these kids with their totally anonymous deeds are stealing away the whole notion of credit! What’s the point of doing something to better the world if you can’t get recognized for it! I don’t’ care that little Timmy gets a better credit score. I want to make it happen but I don’t care if I don’t get my tag or my crew’s known somehow! Doing good isn’t enough! It’s just not enough for us! This is America, we need to do more than good, we need to get recognition!”

As it stands, we have no confirmed cases of foreign hackers taking over American hack jobs and spoofing themselves as American hackers, but that’s simply because we can’t even confirm any of these people aren’t just the same dude replicating himself 400 times to make it look like he has friends, when he doesn’t.

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