Clinton Server Bombshell: More Porn Than E-Mail

Posted By on September 3, 2016

e all know the internet is for porn. DId you know that e-mail servers, cell phones and hands are all for porn, too? We all know the internet is for porn. DId you know that e-mail servers, cell phones and hands are all for porn, too?

We all know the internet is for porn. Did you know that e-mail servers, cell phones and hands are all for porn, too?

The world has been waiting to see what the contents of Hillary Clinton’s deleted e-mails and data from her private server would yield and, finally, the FBI has delivered. Amidst all the political fluff, corporate lobbying and pictures of puppies and kittens, the one surprising element was how much porn there was on her server.

As a rule of thumb, for every gigabyte on the average hard drive, you can expect that about 2-300 megabytes of data is going to be porn, cartoon characters doing dirty things and naked pictures of ex-girlfriends and ex-boyfriends. By comparison, Clinton’s email server had a 700 gigabyte to 1 terabyte ratio. So for every 1000 gigabytes, 700 was porn. That’s a lot of porn.

This treasure trove or pornocupia also has tons of files marked (C) but we’ve figured out that those are not classified. The C stands for… something else. No, not that word, something much worse. It’s… well, let’s just say it rhymes with rum shots.

One interesting stand-out was a video that depicted a Monica Lewinsky lookalike in a threesome with two other women that we couldn’t recognize. We tried to figure out who they were, but by about 2 minutes and 37 seconds into the video, we lost interested and decided to go wash our hands.

Some other stand-out titles were:

  • Bend-Ghazi Over
  • The Oral Orifice
  • Happy Birthday, Madam President
  • 2 Girls, 1 Senator
  • The Nuclear Foot and Balls
  • The 2016 Presidential Erection
  • Lobbyists and Labias
  • 50 States To Loosen Your Lover In
  • Rising On The Poles
  • Separation of Church and Thighs
  • The Clitons
  • The Breast Wing
  • Keep It In The First Family
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